Time

‘Time is what we want most, but what we use worst’ (William Penn)

Time. It’s something we all have in equal share. Every one of us begins each day with 24 hours before the next and yet, how is it that some people seem to achieve so much more in this time frame? I doubt very much that I am the only person who views time as being elusive; an intangible enemy which moves life along far too quickly, leaving you to reminisce on the original plan for a day or week with a heavy sigh, knowing full well that the reality never quite matched up. 

I am a great list-maker and regularly make to-do  lists as long as my arm, objectives to achieve in a given time-frame. Inevitably it is rare that all of these targets are achieved. This then, of course, leaves me with the feeling of guilt that in some way I haven’t achieved the productivity I expected of myself. Productivity… It’s an interesting word isn’t it? The OED definition for this word varies from ‘generating’, ‘creating’ or ‘bringing about’. It denotes activity and busyness: fruitfulness in your endeavours.

Mere hours after I broke up from school for the Easter holidays on Friday, I had drafted a ‘productive’ to-do list for myself. A strict brief involving mundane tasks from washing to ironing to hoovering to gardening as if I wouldn’t be making the most of my time off unless I used it ‘productively’ in this way. In 21^st Century Western culture, we seem to require productivity in order to deem ourselves and our lives useful or meaningful. For many, a productive day at work is the amount of money that is generated or the number of meetings attended. In my case, it would be the depth of learning that took place in my classroom in a given day; the progression of children in my class; the amount of marking or planning that I managed to cram in to the day.

On reflection, I wonder what Jesus’s concept of a ‘productive’ use of time might be. As a man on planet Earth, He had the same amount of time in each day as we do and yet his emphasis was never on what he managed to achieve in a monetary, personal or professional level. His productivity was always outward looking, centred around other people. He viewed the short space of time he was given on Earth as being for service towards others. How many times did he give up his time for others? Stop on his journeys to help the needy and the lost? To heal the blind or diseased? He was never too ‘busy’ to help people and yet how many times have you failed to help someone out because of the busyness of your own agenda? 

All too often, we use the sheer amount we attempt to pack into our own lives as an excuse not to help or listen to others. We consider our own busyness to be of paramount importance because we measure the meaning of our own lives on this type of productivity. 

Take Jesus as the example of productivity that you aspire to model; not the 21^st Century Westernised version. When you open your eyes to the potential of a day in terms of your influence on others’ lives rather than your own, your life will become so much richer and impactful. 

We all begin each and every day with the same amount of time, how will you use yours? 

Right Where You Are

The term ‘itchy feet’ is used commonly in first world society. It denotes a lack of motivation, stimulation or satisfaction in the current circumstances and reflects a desire for change. In our fast moving world, where everything is moving forwards and upwards, it is unsurprising that we feel pressure to be always progressing in our professional as well as our personal lives. The number of conversations I have with friends who express their desire to move on from where they are, to a new man/ house/ car/ job/ church is overwhelming. It’s as if this progression in life is a rite of passage - an expectation even. I’m not for a second suggesting that change is bad, because it’s undoubtedly a necessary and inevitable part of life, but I do wonder where the line stands between ambition and greed. At what point does our pursuit to better ourselves and our lives cross the line from healthy ambition, to unhealthy narcissism?

As a 25 year old, newly married woman – embarking on her career as a teacher, I would be lying if I said I didn’t have ambition and expectation for my life. I’ve been brought up to have ambition and to work hard towards getting to where I want to be. It’s a healthy thing to look for progression and opportunities. However, the danger is when this desire for progression and change becomes the sole pursuit in our lives. When our desire for change blinds us to the blessings which surround us right now. How can we fully appreciate what we have now, if we’re always looking for something else? If you’re looking ahead all the time for the next thing, how will you hear what God wants you to do where you are right now? 

God has a plan for each and every one of our lives. It is a plan for good and not to harm us – to give us a hope and a future. Your future is secure, because He holds it in the palm of His hand. Yes, you will need to take opportunities as they arise. Yes, you will need to work hard; using the gifts and talents that He has blessed you with. BUT, you must also rest in the assurance that your future is safe with Him. Release the reins of control on your life and enjoy what he’s blessed you with now.

Start by getting onto your knees and dedicating today to Him. Don’t wish away the hours and days wanting something other than what you have – you might miss an important task or message that He has for you today.

Pray. Listen. Obey. And God will use you mightily.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths (Proverbs 3: 5-6)

Worrier or Warrior?

So, it’s confession time… One of the many deficiencies of my character is that I am a great worrier. I worry about all sorts of things which, though small and insignificant in reality can be built up in my mind to become huge, mountainous obstructions in my life. I’ve lost many a night’s sleep worrying about the coming day or week, working my way through all the possible scenarios and ways that things could go wrong. Inevitably, thanks to the grace of God, the reality is never as bad as my mind has made me believe and the days have passed calmly. And yet, I’m still guilty of measuring the imminent ‘success’ (or not) of the coming week by the number of stressful or ‘scary’ situations I will need to encounter. It leads me to ask the question, why do I this to myself? Why allow myself to lose precious life-moments by worrying about the next day, or the next week? What do I gain from worrying? 

I have often wondered at friends or colleagues who seem to breeze through life with a calm, laid back attitude to it all. They take life’s rocky, windy roads in their stride; taking each day as it comes, not wasting time with worry about what could happen, but applying themselves wholeheartedly in ‘the now’. Their ability to let go and relax is infuriating. Even more infuriating to me is that I’ve married one of them. My husband’s unshakeable confidence in God’s goodness to him and in his life manifests itself in a lack of worry about the future. I don’t think he’s lost a day’s sleep in his life because of worry and I envy this outlook. It’s not to say that he’s irresponsible – he plans for the future and gives careful thought before making important decisions, but he doesn’t sweat about the things that are out of his control. What an amazing perspective on life? What freedom to live life confidently without worry.

God doesn’t ask us to worry. He sometimes asks us to wait, but never to worry. In fact, he expressly states his desire for us not to stress about the things that aren’t in our control: 

^‘So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.’ (Matthew 6:34)

I like to think I’m a fairly grounded person. I am rooted in my faith and have my identity in Christ Jesus. I know that God holds me and my life in the palm of His hand and I work hard to show God’s love to other people. I completely believe that God has a plan for my life and I work hard to align myself and the decisions I make with the Bible. I believe the promises that He makes to me in the Bible... why worry?!

So, I devote this coming week to Him. Because it’s His already. He’s in it all, but more than that; He’s bigger than it all too. I choose to take each day as it comes, handing each and every day over to Him; simply because He is God, he is good and He loves me unconditionally.

This blog post is as much a message to me as to anyone else who needs to hear it. It marks the start of a difficult, but exciting endeavour for myself - an ambition to live life without sweating the small stuff. Today, I choose to leave behind the worrier and embrace the warrior in me. Why not join me?

^‘Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.’ (Philippians 4:6-7)

The Great Juggling Act

It’s a surprising, but true fact of life that often the things that you put the least effort into are the most successful. This week, I have been reminded again of God’s supreme goodness to me, through his amazing faithfulness to aspects of my life that I have neglected. It is fair to say that, as a teacher, there are numerous balls flying in the air around my frazzled head at any given time. What with lessons to plan; parents to appease; children to discipline, pacify or build up; marking to complete; referrals to make; matches to organise; extra curricular clubs to run – I spend  the 10 hours of my day in the school building completely and utterly flat out. 

Inevitably, the ball juggling act is impossible to maintain at a constant pace and the occasional ball will drop out of your line of vision. There are always balls that you perceive to be bigger and more precious - the ones you feel the need to concentrate on… Perhaps the ones that are more likely to crash catastrophically should you take your eyes off them. They’re the ones that people are watching – judging your handling of with critical, knowing eyes. Due to the enormity of certain projects on my plate at the moment, I have, to my shame, neglected other, less ‘public’ projects – though ones which would give God the glory.

… And yet…

It’s these that God catches before they hit the floor, elevating them higher than you could even have imagined. I have been amazed by His faithfulness to me this week, even when I fail to prioritise the things in my life properly. Even when I work hard to please people instead of God, he doesn’t give up on me, but helps me to recognise the hidden, surprising blessings in my life.

I have learnt once again the importance of leaning on God, rather than relying on my own strength and ability to juggle everything successfully. I have also learnt that sometimes, just sometimes, it is OK to be out of control… to not have everything organised and planned perfectly. Because it’s in these moments that there is space for God to break in and for His will to be done.  In this context, you are forced to ask for help, because you simply can’t do it alone. And, by His almighty grace, He will break in and help out.

I challenge you to take a look at your life this week. Think about where your priorities lie (and where they don’t!) and where God is keeping things afloat, through no real effort on your part. Find the time to thank him for His awesome faithfulness and goodness to you. Give Him the glory and watch what he does through these aspects of your life. I guarantee exciting things will happen when you give Him the glory – just you wait and see!

'Give all your worries to Him, because He cares for you' (1 Peter 5:7)